Coffee Roaster Slapdown!


The Gentle Tyranny Of The Drum!

I hit the break-even point with my Tiny Fresh Roaster+8, and hadn’t become bored watching tumbling coffee beans or irritated with the resulting silver skin chaff.  Okay, onwards and upwards!  It’s time for a drum roaster that roasts larger controlled batches more slowly.  My beloved FR+8 will go into reserve status up in the cupboard.

And so my research began:  Okay, with that low-end clunky-looking Behmor 1600 I’d hit the break-even point in a little over a year—sounds good—but there seemed to be as many unhappy users as happy ones out in the home roasting matrix.

The Gene Café, which resembles an enhanced Ball of Death for gray/green motor-roasting-cycles, got much better reviews and my financial break-even point would be in about two years.

The Hottop Coffee Roaster, which resembles Buster Crabb’s Sky City Rocketship, also received good reviews, except for the expense and hassle of periodically purchasing/replacing its rear filter.  Break-even point: four years, plus filters.

Or I could purchase a low-end commercial drum roaster and break-even in 2039—during the hundredth anniversary of Hitler’s Invasion of Poland.  A downside to consider: the neighbors might complain about the smoke occasionally wafting out of my two car garage…Or they might call the fire department!

Driven by an inner imperative for the simple/unencumbered life, while slowly roasting coffee as a 19th century

gentleman (or maybe Bridget the Irish maid had those duties), I declared Clean Gene and the Coffee Beans of Death the winner.  I banged my credit card information into the laptop, shot it into cyberspace and patiently waited for the arrival of my new toy roaster.

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